Tuesday, August 20, 2019
Druids Essay -- essays research papers fc
DRUIDS Who were the Druids? The stereotypical image of a Druid is one of a thoughtful philosopher and magician, schooled in the lore of the traditions, and in charge of the education of the chieftains as well as those who sought to obtain knowledge considered obscure by the rest of society. They were knowers of truth, able to manipulate that truth as well as inform others of it. Druids not only influenced society religiously, they also influenced it socially i.e. they took on the parts of teachers, judges, magicians, craftsmen, advisors, priests, and masters of ceremonies, and in doing so, were greatly respected in society. The Role of Druids Teachers Caesar remarked that Druidism originated in Britain and that students would travel there for instruction, information and advice on astronomy, the ââ¬Ëessential nature of thingsââ¬â¢, and the power and authority of the Gods- both local and pan-Celtic deities. Their religion forbade them to write down what was being taught, as stated by Athelia Nihtscada: Druids of the past sought to preserve knowledge through passing their traditions to their students. Unfortunately, they did not feel it prudent to write any of this knowledge down lest the knowledge fall into the wrong hands or lose power, leaving us having to piece together what little we do know from other writers through the ages. Because Nihtscada is a woman born with Celtic roots, and was initiated into the Druidic tradition herself, this modern source is quite reliable. She is also a public speaker with a deep interest in her Celtic heritage. Her aim therefore, was to provide readers with accurate information about the Celts, much of which corresponds with information provided by the Romans. Instead of writing, information was communicated and learnt through verse. In fact, there were so many verses that the druids spent about 20 years studying them, learning about oral literature of sacred songs, prayers, incantations, divination and magic. Despite this however, not one verse has survived, nor are there any pure Druidic legends as all of them have been subjected to Christian or Roman interpretation. Master of Ceremonies Druids, as masters of ceremonies, are renowned for administering animal, and sometimes even human sacrifices, as told by the Romans. Pliny the Elder describes one Druidic ceremony in his Naturalis Historia (XVI, 95): "Anything growing... ...ltic lifestyle. Bibliography - The Early History of Rome (Books I-V), Titus Livy, Penguin Library of History (Books XVI.66-XVII), Diodorus Siculus, Loeb Classical Library - The Gallic War, Julius Caesar, Loeb Classical Library - Natural History, Pliny the Elder, Oxford University Press - The Tain Translated from the Irish Epic Tain Bo Cuailnge, Oxford Paperbacks à ³ Tuathail, Seà ¡n. The Excellence of the Ancient Word. Available via internet at: ftp://bronze.coil.com/pub/nemeton/lore/eaw.cnl Geography, Strabo, Loeb Classical Library - http://www.themystica.com/mystica/articles/d/druidism.html - http://www.religioustolerance.org/druid.htm - http://witcombe.sbc.edu/earthmysteries/EMDruids.html - http://celt.net/Celtic/History/d_overview.html - http://www.britannia.com/wonder/michell2.html - "Story of Druidsâ⬠, Microsoftà ® Encartaà ® Encyclopedia 2001. à © 1993-2000 Microsoft Corporation.
Monday, August 19, 2019
Compare the predicament of women in society as described in Cousin Essa
Compare the predicament of women in society as described in Cousin Kate and The Seduction. How far do you sympathise with them? ââ¬ËThe Seductionââ¬â¢ and ââ¬ËCousin Kateââ¬â¢ are similarly concerned with the predicament of women in society. They are both poems which end up in a negative position, and are following the trails of a young girl, wanting to be loved, in some way. They also similarly carry the theme of betrayal. In ââ¬ËThe Seductionââ¬â¢, the girl is betrayed by the teenage magazines promising her the romantic love story she always wanted and, in ââ¬ËCousin Kateââ¬â¢, the young girl is betrayed by her cousin, who steals the man she loves. These are the predicaments that both the girls have. Both poems contain lines which question their actions, ââ¬ËWhy did a great Lord find me out?ââ¬â¢ and ââ¬ËFor where, now, was the summer of her sixteenth year?ââ¬â¢. This shows the regret that they had in that period in their lives, and also how betrayed they feel and the problems they have now of losing their childhood. ââ¬ËCousin Kateââ¬â¢ tells us the story of how she was seduced, used and cast away, much like ââ¬ËThe Seductionââ¬â¢. As ââ¬ËThe Seductionââ¬â¢ begins, it uses a lot of imagery to prepare the reader for what may happen. ââ¬ËFar past the silver stream of traffic through the city, far from the blind windows of the tower blocksââ¬â¢. The ââ¬Ëblindââ¬â¢ windows portrays an image of not seeing, and that because something ââ¬Ëbadââ¬â¢ may happen, no-one is meant to see or hear anything. Also, when the poem refers to the girl knocking back the vodka, it shows an uncertain situation, ââ¬ËHe handed her the vodka, and she knocked it back like waterââ¬â¢. Both girls at the start of the poem are virgins but lose their virginity and fall pregnant. The girl in ââ¬ËCousin Kateââ¬â¢, is refer... ...magazines she was reading to have sex, but there was probably pressure from her friends, as I know that there is today, and the poem was not written that far from today. Not only was there great pressure before she had sex, but the shame and feelings that she was put through from society was extreme, and this, in my opinion, should not have been placed upon her. Although similar things happened in ââ¬ËCousin Kateââ¬â¢, I donââ¬â¢t think they did to the same extent, and, at the very least, the ââ¬ËCottage Maidenââ¬â¢ was left with something to treasure and that she was proud of. Although abortions were not a regular occurrence, I still think she was in a better position to keep the baby. Whereas, in ââ¬ËThe Seductionââ¬â¢, I think she would have been forced to have an abortion, or if she had kept the baby, she would have been under great emotion and also financial difficulties.
Sunday, August 18, 2019
The role of Women in Greece :: essays research papers
Greek women, as depicted as in their history and literature, endure many hardships and struggle to establish a meaningful status in their society. In the Odyssey, Penelopeââ¬â¢s only role in the epic is to support Odysseus and remain loyal to him. She is at home and struggles to keep her family intact while Odysseus is away trying to return to his native land. The cultural role of women is depicted as being supportive of man and nothing more. Yet what women in ancient Greece did long ago was by far more impressive than what men did. Unfortunately though, they were still placed at a level that was below man because he is depicted as being the root of the family. This fact not only holds true for The Odyssey but in the ancient Greek way of life, too. For example, women did not have such a meaningful role in Greek drama as the men did. The parts of women would be played by men in the majority of the plays. The reason this took place was because all of the playwrights were men. There were cases in which women were used in plays but they were used solely as models. Nonetheless, all of the types of women that lived in ancient Greece were depicted in all of the playwrights. The women in these plays were depicted by the role of a sinner, saint, poetess, coward, heroine, and many more. This was purposefully done in an attempt to make the audience relate to a certain character. In doing so, they could imagine that they were indeed a part of the play to some extent. As a result, these characters have significant religious meanings and serve as a form of inspiration to other women. This would mainly apply to those women who were in attendance. This would include women of all classes that simply wanted to watch a play. à à à à à Their limitations amongst society can also be noticed by the amount of education that they are entitled to. Platoââ¬â¢s Republic mentions how the role of women is determined by the status of their spouse. For instance, if a woman were to be the wife of a guard, then she would be expected to live at the level of that status, too. She is expected to be able to contribute to society a great deal more rather than stay at home and take care of her children and household.
Saturday, August 17, 2019
Intro to Hospitality Case Study #1
Complete Case Study #1 Meatââ¬â¢s Impact Intro to Hospitality Management Professor: Warren Jahn November 18, 2012 From reading ââ¬Å"Meats Impactâ⬠, it is important to note that eating less meat lowers heart disease, diabetes, and colorectal cancer. Also, by substituting eggs or fish for red meat and dairy one day of the week for one year would reduce greenhouse gas emissions. It states that people who eat more red meat than others have a 40% higher risk of dying of a heart attack, stroke, etc.For every kilogram of beef we eat, 27 kilograms of greenhouse gases are released into the environment (Meatââ¬â¢s Impact). This article points out specific things about eating red meat and how it impacts a personââ¬â¢s health. I do not believe that this article will persuade the restaurant industry to change because honestly, these are things that have to be decided by ourselves, no one can make the changes in our lives, only we can. It is hard to say that the restaurant industry would be to blame for me getting a heart attack because I decided to eat a lot of red meat in my life.They would be to blame if they forced me to order it or forced me to eat it, but it would be my decision and not theirs to eat and order red meat. This article is a good wake up call for those of us that do not feel as though eating red meat is a big deal to our health or the environment for that matter. It shows statistics of what happens when we make unhealthy choices and it explains how not only does it affect us (our bodies) but it affect everyone around us too, through the environment.It is a good read for everyone to know what they are putting into their bodies and for them to know the differences that they could make if they would not eat red meat. Other than that it is not a big threat to the restaurant industry because they are going to keep selling meat regardless of what this article says. It is a matter of personal preference not whether or not red meat should be sold a t restaurants. If for some reason it would impact the restaurant industry it would be by not allowing them to sell red meat at their establishment.This would ensure that no one will order red meat and eat it, making the right decision and helping themselves and the environment in the long run. For some reason, it seems like it would illegal or unconstitutional to make the restaurant industry not sell red meat but there are other places that sell insects and people eat there and thatââ¬â¢s fine. In my opinion, this is all a matter of personal preference and whether or not you are or want to be on a healthy streak or just plain out be healthy altogether.No one can or should try to make anyone do anything they do not want to do because more than likely it will be unsuccessful because there is no cooperation from the person. The issues raised by CSPI are justified just because they try to educate the public on their health and a lot of people are not educated in this topic and allow themselves to be taken advantage of when out eating by not knowing what they are putting in their bodies.It makes sense that they would want to keep everyone safe and allow them the chance to make their own decisions based on what they learn from them. Itââ¬â¢s good for an organization to keep their eye out for the public and help them realize when something is not good for their health/well being. Granted, it should not be taken to the extreme of trying to force the restaurant industry into doing what they do because not everyone wants to live the healthy lifestyle.It would make sense if people would want them to mind their own business because it probably puts a damper on the restaurant business because of it. It probably slows their business down because of the some investigations and or researching that CSPI might do or would want to do. Overall, I think that they have a good idea of how the public should perceive the restaurant industry but they should also keep in mind that they cannot force people to do what they want them to do.The restaurant industry should also keep in mind that they should have to be forthcoming with what they put on their menu, like seeing the amount of calories for each plate or seeing what the ingredients are for some dishes. This way it would give CSPI a peace of mind and allow the customers to make educated decisions on their entrees. References 1. Kohrman, H, (2012). Meatââ¬â¢s Impact. Retrieved from http://www. cspinet. org/nah/pdfs/meatsimpact. pdf
Friday, August 16, 2019
Friends and Family
Friends are biggest value in peopleââ¬â¢s lives. I have many friends. Most of them are my neighbors, but also I have schoolmates. I can go out somewhere with them and feel comfortable. I know that friends of mine will help me anytime and anywhere. I can trust them. I have one best friend. I may pin his faith. Friendship between a friend of mine and me is firm and intense. He always helps me solve problems and treats me with respect. A friend of mine has never lied to me. It is better to say home truth that sweet lie. If I am upset, my best friend will jolly up me. He is caring, cheerful, trustworthy, outgoing and good-tempered. He is younger than I am. I think that age is not important for a friendship if you can come to an understanding and respect each other. I have friends among people of a different generation. I like younger mates because I can be child . Older people are serious and calm. They care about their studies or jobs. They have less free time. However, I like them because they can teach me something and share their experience. Older friends may help me to do my homework and explain me what I cannot understand. Friends are one of life treasures so that we have to treasure our friendships. It is not easy to make friends nowadays. The true friend should be honest and trustworthy. Without these characteristics, you cannot have a friendship with anyone. Person must be sociable, tolerant, conscientious, and good-tempered if he wants make friends. Furthermore, he must understand other personââ¬â¢s feelings and moods and always help him. If person wants not to lose old friends, he should care about them. He should call them and ask how they are. We should safe our relationships. If we break friendship, it will be hard to recover it. I suppose that friendship is a state when you feel important and you know that you can do something helpful or needful to your friend. Sometimes you see somebody for the first time and that is strange when you feel you are friends for ages. My ideal friend has to be himself. I donââ¬â¢t think, I should name any of his/her (later on: he) character features. Itââ¬â¢s even doesnââ¬â¢t matter when he has something, what doesnââ¬â¢t exist in rules of ideal man ââ¬â e. g. unpolitness. Itââ¬â¢s better when the social mask is not worn and you can talk to your friend and be absolutely ensured that he is not lying and he will help not every time, but only those times, when he could. I believe thatââ¬â¢s very important. I donââ¬â¢t agree also to the idea that friends, having in common only external personalities are bad ones. I donââ¬â¢t think that itââ¬â¢s good to have a friend for a life. After some years you feel kind of exhausted and the light of the friendship begins to go out. People with external similarities can also be very good friends and the ones only with internal sometimes even canââ¬â¢t talk ââ¬â e. . when he thinks right the same way, i think, itââ¬â¢s not interesting for me to talk with him, because i know how he thinks and i want to know more different people and to hear different oppinions. So, I must disappoint you, but I needless to say, having some internal common points. You donââ¬â¢t have to have a friend (like the po em, we read, says) but having one makes your life, your steps through the life much more easier and funnier. Nowadays often debated theme is the choice between a family and friends. For me a family is more important than friends. There are some thoughts about this lemma. Firstly, I think that a family is more important than friends, because when you are born you fall into a family not into your friendsââ¬â¢ circle. First people with whom you get acquainted after your birth are your faSecondly, when we are teenagers for us it looks like that our family members are our enemies. We try to run from our family to our friends, but if it happens a really big problem, we come back to our family, because family is our most immediate and precious people. In our hearts we know that if nobody helps us, we can always rely on our family. But if we look at the another side of the coin, we can see that sometimes there are such problems in a family that parents canââ¬â¢t take care of their own children. In such situation we can trust just for our friends help, because family canââ¬â¢t help us. Finally, I think that not just family members have to help us. Sometimes we must help our family. Maybe then we will be able to say that our choice is family. In conclusion, I can say that we should never forget our nearest realatives. We should never forget and abandon our family. mily members. With no-one else, but just with your family help, you get known the world. Friends and family are important in our lifes, but the question is ââ¬â which, friends or family, are more important for us? I believe that family is more significant then friends. In the first place, we can always trust our familyââ¬â¢s members. When we have a trouble and we need some help, who will help us first? Of course, our familyââ¬â¢s members. In addition, family supports you materrialy. Everything what you are wering, all notebooks, pens and other things you need at school and not just here are bought by your parents ( If you are still child ). Who else if not they buy you all these thinkgs abd help you tu survive? On the other hand, some people think, that friends are more important for their lifes. However, most of them forgot that friends are with you just while everything is good. Unfrotunately, when something bad occurs to you and you need their help, most of them turn their backs. Finally, I believe that family is the biggest support in our lifes, thatââ¬â¢s why they are more imposrtant.
Thursday, August 15, 2019
Parent governors Essay
Parent governors are elected by parents / guardians of pupils that attend the school. If there is a vacancy parents are asked to nominate fellow parents, if more people are nominated than there is vacancies an election takes place. Staff governors Staff governors are in most schools and are appointed by support staff that work at the school. If they leave the school they cannot continue being staff governors. Teacher governors Teacher governors are elected by other teachers at the school. They must be permanent members of staff, again if they leave the school they cannot continue being a teacher governor. Community governors Community governors are people who live or work locally to the school and are chosen by the governing body. They are people who are committed to helping towards the success of the school. Foundation governors Foundation governors are chosen by foundation, voluntary aided or voluntary controlled schools. They represent the church or voluntary trust that set up the school. They have a responsibility to make sure the school is following the beliefs of the trust or charity. Sponsor governors Sponsor governors are people that have given financial assistance or services to the school. Head teacher The head teacher is a governor because of the post they hold. They do not have to accept the post but if that is the case the position stays open for them.
Wednesday, August 14, 2019
Carrie Chapter Two
ââ¬ËI'm sure she'll be all right,' she said. ââ¬ËCarrie only has to go over to Carlin Street. The fresh air will do her good.' Morton gave the girl the yellow slip. ââ¬ËYou can go now, Cassie,' he said magnanimously. ââ¬ËThat's not my name!' she screamed suddenly. Morton recoiled, and Miss Desjardin jumped as if struck from behind. The heavy ceramic ashtray on Morton's desk (it was Rodin's Thinker with his head turned into a receptacle for cigarette butts) suddenly toppled to the rug, as if to take cover from the force of her scream. Butts and flakes of Morton's pipe tobacco scattered on the pale-green nylon rug. ââ¬ËNow, listen,' Morton said, trying to muster sternness, ââ¬ËI know you're upset, but that doesn't mean I'll stand for-ââ¬Ë ââ¬ËPlease,' Miss Desjardin said quietly. Morton blinked at her and then nodded curtly. He tried to project the image of a lovable John Wayne figure while performing the disciplinary functions that were his main job as Assistant Principal, but did not succeed very well. The administration (usually represented at Jay Cee suppers, P.T.A. functions, and American Legion award ceremonies by Principal Henry Grayle) usually termed him ââ¬Ëlovable Mort.' The student body was more apt to term him ââ¬Ëthat crazy ass-jabber from the office.' But, as few students such as Billy deLois and Henry Trennant spoke at P.T.A. functions or town meetings, the administration's view tended to carry the day. Now lovable Mort, still secretly nursing his jammed thumb, smiled at Carrie and said, ââ¬ËGo along then if you like, Miss Wright. Or would you like to sit a spell and just collect yourself?' ââ¬ËI'll go,' she muttered, and swiped at her hair. She got up, then looked around at Miss Desjardin. Her eyes were wide open and dark with knowledge. ââ¬ËThey laughed at me. Threw things. They've always laughed,' Desjardin could only look at her helplessly. Carrie left. For a moment there was silence; Morton and Desjardin watched her go. Then, with an awkward throat-clearing sound, Mr Morton hunkered down carefully and began to sweep together the debris from the fallen ashtray. ââ¬ËWhat was that all about?' She sighed and looked at the drying maroon hand-print on her shorts with distaste. ââ¬ËShe got her period. Her first period. In the shower.' Morton cleared his throat again and his cheeks went pink. The sheet of paper he was sweeping with moved even faster. ââ¬ËIsn't she a bit, uh-ââ¬Ë ââ¬ËOld for her first? Yes. That's what made it so traumatic for her. Although I can't understand why her motherâ⬠¦' The thought trailed off, forgotten for the moment. ââ¬ËI don't think I handled it very well, Morty, but I didn't understand what was going on. She thought she was bleeding to death.' He stared up sharply. ââ¬ËI don't believe she knew there was such a thing as menstruation until half an hour ago.' ââ¬ËHand me that little brush there, Miss Desjardin. Yes, that's it.' She handed him a little brush with the legend Chamberlain Hardware and Lumber Company NEVER Brushes You Off written up the handle. He began to brush his pile of ashes on to the paper. ââ¬ËThere's still going to be some for the vacuum cleaner, I guess. This deep pile is miserable. I thought I set that ashtray back on the desk further. Funny how things fall over.' He bumped his head on the desk and sat up abruptly. ââ¬ËIt's hard for me to believe that a girl in this or any other high school could get through three years and still be alien to the fact of menstruation, Miss Desjardin.' ââ¬ËIt's even more difficult for me, she said. ââ¬ËBut it's all I can think of to explain her reaction. And she's always been a group scapegoat.' ââ¬ËUrn.' He funnelled the ashes and butts into the wastebasket and dusted his hands. ââ¬ËI've placed her, I think. White. Margaret White's daughter. Must be. That makes it a little easier to believe.' He sat down behind his desk and smiled apologetically. ââ¬ËThere's so many of them. After five years or so, they all start to merge into one group face. You call boys by their brother's names, that type of thing. It's hard.' ââ¬ËOf course it is.' ââ¬ËWait 'til you've been in the game twenty years, like me,' he said morosely, looking down at his blood blister. ââ¬ËYou get kids that look familiar and find out you had their daddy the year you started teaching. Margaret White was before my time, for which I am profoundly grateful. She told Mrs Bicente, God rest her, that the Lord was reserving a special burning seat in hell for her because she gave the kids an outline of Mr Darwin's beliefs on evolution. She was suspended twice while she was here ââ¬â once for beating a classmate with her purse. Legend has it that Margaret saw the classmate smoking a cigarette. Peculiar religious views. Very peculiar.' His John Wayne expression suddenly snapped down. ââ¬ËThe other girls. Did they really laugh at her?' ââ¬ËWorse. They were yelling and throwing sanitary napkins at her when I walked in. Throwing them like.. like peanuts.' ââ¬ËOh. Oh, dear.' John Wayne disappeared. Mr Morton went scarlet. ââ¬ËYou have names?' ââ¬ËYes. Not all of them, although some of them may rat on the rest. Christine Hargensen appeared to be the ringleader â⬠¦ as usual.' ââ¬ËChris and her Mortimer Snurds,' Morton murmured. ââ¬ËYes. Tina Blake, Rachel Spies, Helen Shyres, Donna Thibodeau and her sister Fern, Lila Grace, Jessica Upshaw. And Sue Snell.' She frowned. ââ¬ËYou wouldn't expect a trick like that from Sue. She's never seemed the type for this kind of a ââ¬â stunt.' ââ¬ËDid you talk to the girls involved?' Miss Desjardin chuckled unhappily. ââ¬ËI got them the hell out of there. I was too flustered. And Carrie was having hysterics.' ââ¬ËUm.' He steepled his fingers. ââ¬ËDo you plan to talk to them?' ââ¬ËYes.' But she sounded reluctant. ââ¬ËDo I detect a note of-ââ¬Ë ââ¬ËYou probably do,' she said glumly. ââ¬ËI'm living in a glass house, see. I understand how those girls felt. The whole thing just made me want to take the girl and shake her. Maybe-there's some kind of instinct about menstruation that makes women want to snarl. I don't know. I keep seeing Sue Snell and the way she looked.' ââ¬ËUm,' Mr Morton repeated wisely. He did not understand women and had no urge at all to discuss menstruation. ââ¬ËI'll talk to them tomorrow,' she promised, rising. ââ¬ËRip them down one side and up the other.' ââ¬ËGood. Make the punishment suit the crime. And if you feel you have to send any of them to, ah, to me, feel free-ââ¬Ë ââ¬ËI will,' she said kindly. ââ¬ËBy the way, a light blew out while I was trying to calm her down. It added the final touch.' ââ¬ËI'll send a janitor right down,' he promised. ââ¬ËAnd thanks for doing your best, Miss Desjardin. Will you have Miss Fish send in Billy and Henry?' ââ¬ËCertainly.' She left. He leaned back and let the whole business slide out of his mind. When Billy deLois and Henry Trennant, classcutters extraordinaire, slunk in, he glared at them happily and prepared to talk tough. As he often told Hank Grayle, he ate class-cutters for lunch. Graffiti scratched on a desk in Chamberlain Junior High School: Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, but Carrie While eats shit. She walked down Ewin Avenue and crosssed over to Carlin at the stoplight on the corner. Her head was down and she was trying to think of nothing. Cramps came and went in great, gripping waves, making her slow down and speed up like a car with carburettor trouble. She stared at the sidewalk. Quartz glittering in the cement. Hop-scotch grids scratched in ghostly, rain-faded chalk. Wads of gum stamped flat. Pieces of tinfoil and penny-candy wrappers. They all hate and they never stop. They never get tired of it. A penny lodged in a crack. She kicked it. Imagine Chris Hargensen all bloody and screaming for mercy. With rats crawling all over her face. Good. Good. That would be good. A dog turd with a foot-track in the middle of it. A roll of blackened caps that some kid had banged with a stone. Cigarette butts. Crash in her head with a rock, with a boulder. Crash in all their hearts. Good. Good. (saviour Jesus meek and mild) That was good for Momma, all right for her. She didn't have to go among the wolves every day of every year, out into a carnival of laughers, joke-tellers, pointers, snickerers. And didn't Momma say there would be a Day of Judgment. (the name of that star shall be wormwood and they shall be scourged with scorpions) and an angel with a sword? If only it would be today and Jesus coming not with a lamb and a shepherd's crook, but with a boulder on each hand to crush the laughters and the snickerers, to root out the evil and destroy it screaming ââ¬â a terrible Jesus of blood and righteousness. And if only she could be His sword and His arm. She had tried to fit. She had defied Momma in a hundred little ways, had tried to erase the red-plague circle that had been drawn around her from the first day she had left the controlled environment of the small house on Carlin Street and had walked up to the Baker Street Grammar School with her Bible under her arm. She could still remember that day, the stares, and the sudden, awful silence when she had gotten down on her knees before lunch in the school cafeteria-the laughter had begun on that day and had echoed up through the years. The red-plague circle was like blood itself-you could scrub and scrub and scrub and still it would be there, not erased, not clean. She had never gotten on her knees in a public place again, although she had not told Momma that. Still, the original memory remained, with her and with them. She had fought Momma tooth and nail over the Christian Church Camp, and had earned the money to go herself by taking in sewing. Momma told her darkly that it was Sin, that it was Methodists and Baptists and Congregationalists and that it was Sin and Backsliding. She forbade Carrie to swim at the camp. Yet although she had swum and had laughed when they ducked her (until she couldn't get her breath any more and they kept doing it and she got panicky and began to scream) and had tried to take part in the camp's activities, a thousand practical jokes had been played on ol' prayin' Carrie and she had come home on the bus a week early, her eyes red and socketed from weeping, to be picked up by Momma at t he station, and Momma had told her grimly that she should treasure the memory of her scourging as proof that Momma knew, that Momma was right, that the only hope of safety and salvation was inside the red circle. ââ¬ËFor straight is the gate,' Momma said grimly in the taxi, and at home she had sent Carrie to the closet for six hours. Momma had, of course, forbade her to shower with the other girls; Carrie had hidden her shower things in her school locker and had showered anyway, taking part in a naked ritual that was shameful and embarrassing to her in hopes that the circle around her might fade a little, just a little- (but today o today) Tommy Erbter, age five, was biking up the other side of the street. He was a small, intense-looking boy on a twenty-inch Schwinn with bright-red training wheels. He was humming ââ¬ËScoobie Doo, where are you?' under his breath. He saw Carrie, brightened, and stuck out his tongue. ââ¬ËHey, ol' fart-face! Ol' prayin' Carrie!' Carrie glared at him with sudden smoking rage. The bike wobbled on its training wheels and suddenly fell over. Tommy screamed. The bike was on top of him. Carrie smiled and walked on. The sound of Tommy's wails was sweet, jangling music in her ears. If only she could make something like that happen whenever she liked. (just did) She stopped dead seven houses up from her own, staring blankly at nothing. Behind her, Tommy was climbing tearfully back on to his bike, nursing a scraped knee. He yelled something at her, but she ignored it. She had been yelled at by experts. She had been thinking: (fall off that bike kid push you off that bike and split your rotten head) And something had happened Her mind had â⬠¦ had â⬠¦ she groped for a word. Had flexed. That was not just right, but it was very close. There had been a curious mental bending, almost like an elbow curling a dumbbell. That wasn't exactly right either, but it was all she could think of. An elbow with no strength. A weak baby muscle. Flex. She suddenly stared fiercely at Mrs Yorraty's big picture window. She thought: (stupid frumpty old bitch break that window) Nothing. Mrs Yorraty's picture window glittered serenely in the fresh nine o'clock glow of morning. Another cramp gripped Carrie's belly and she walked on. But â⬠¦ The light. And the ashtray; don't forget the ashtray. She looked back (old bitch hates my momma) over her shoulder. Again it seemed that something flexed â⬠¦ but very weakly. The flow of her thoughts shuddered as if there had been a sudden bubbling from a wellspring deeper inside. The picture window seemed to ripple. Nothing more. It could have been her eyes. Could have been. Her head began to feel tired and fuzzy, and it throbbed with the beginning of a headache. Her eyes were hot, as if she had just sat down and read the Book of Revelations straight through. She continued to walk down the street toward the small white house with the blue shutters. The familiar hate-love-dread feeling was churning inside her. Ivy had crawled up the west side of the bungalow (they always called it the bungalow because the White house sounded like a political joke and Momma said all politicians were crooks and sinners and would eventually give the country over to the Godless Reds who would put all the believers of Jesus ââ¬â even the Catholics ââ¬â up against the wall), and the ivy was picturesque, she knew it was, but sometimes she hated it. Sometimes, like now, the ivy looked like a grotesque giant hand ridged with great veins which had sprung up out of the ground to grip the building. She approached it with dragging feet. Of course, there had been the stones. She stopped again, blinking vapidly at the day. The stones. Momma never talked about that; Carrie didn't even know if her momma still remembered the day of the stones. It was surprising that she herself still remembered it. She had been a very little girl then. How old? Three? Four? There had been the girl in the white bathing suit, and then the stones came. And things had flown in the house. Here the memory was, suddenly bright and clear. As if it had been here all along, just below the surface, waiting for a kind of mental puberty. Waiting, maybe, for today. From Carrie: The Black Dawn of T.K. (Esquire Magazine, September 12, 1980) by Jack Gaver: Estelle Horan had lived in the neat San Diego suburb of Parrish for twelve years, and outwardly she is typical Mrs California: She wears bright print shifts and smoked amber sunglasses; her hair is black-streaked blonde; she drives a neat maroon Volkswagen Formula Vee with a smile decal on the petrol cap and a green-flag ecology sticker on the back window. Her husband is an executive at the Parrish branch of the Bank of America; her son and daughter are certified members of the Southern California Sun ââ¬Ën Fun Crowd, burnished-brown beach creatures. There is a hibachi in the small, beautifully kept back yard, and the door chimes play a tinkly phrase from the refrain of ââ¬ËHey, Jude.' But Mrs Horan still carries the thin, difficult soil of New England somewhere inside her, and when she talks of Carrie White her face takes on an odd, pinched look that is more like Lovecraft out of Arkham than Kerouac out of Southern Cat. ââ¬ËOf course she was strange,' Estelle Horan tells me. lighting a second Virginia Slim a moment after stubbing out her first. ââ¬ËThe whole family was strange. Ralph was a construction worker, and people on the street said he carried a Bible and a .38 revolver to work with him every day. The Bible was for his coffee break and lunch. The .38 was in case he met Antichrist on the job, I can remember the Bible myself. The revolver â⬠¦ who knows? He was a big olive-skinned man with his hair always shaved into a flattop crewcut. He always looked mean. And you didn't meet his eyes, not ever. They were so intense they actually seemed to glow. When you saw him coming you crossed the street and you never stuck out your tongue at his back, not ever. That's how spooky he was.' She pauses, puffing clouds of cigarette smoke toward the pseudo-redwood beams that cross the ceiling. Stella Horan lived on Carlin Street until she was twenty, commuting to day classes at Lewin Business College in Motton. But she remembers the incidents of the stones very clearly. ââ¬ËThere are times,' she says, ââ¬Ëwhen I wonder if I might have caused it. Their back yard was next to ours, and Mrs White had put in a hedge but it hadn't grown out yet. She'd called my mother dozens of times about ââ¬Å"the showâ⬠I was putting on in my back yard. Well, my bathing suit was perfectly decent ââ¬â prudish by today's standards ââ¬â nothing but a plain old one-piece Jantzen. Mrs White used to go on and on about what a scandal it was for ââ¬Å"her baby.â⬠My mother..-. well, she tries to be polite, but her temper is so quick. I don't know what Margaret White did to finally push her over the edge ââ¬â called me the Whore of Babylon, I suppose ââ¬â but my mother told her our yard was our yard and I'd go out and dance the hootchie-kootchie buck naked if that was her pleasure and mine. She also told her that she was a dirty old woman with a can of worms for a mind. There was a lot more shouting, but that was the upshot of it. ââ¬ËI wanted to stop sunbathing right then. I hate trouble. It upsets my stomach. But Mom-when she gets a case, she's a terror. She came home from Jordan Marsh with a little white bikini. Told me I might as well get all the sun I could. ââ¬Å"After all,â⬠she said, ââ¬Å"the privacy of our own back yard and all.â⬠Stella Horan smiles a little at the memory and crushes out her cigarette. ââ¬ËI tried to argue with her, tell her I didn't want any more trouble, didn't want to be a pawn in their back-fence war. Didn't do a bit of good. Trying to stop my mum when she' gets a bee in her hat is like trying to stop a Mack truck going downhill with no brakes. Actually, there was more to it. I was scared of the Whites. Real religious nuts are nothing to fool with. Sure, Ralph White was dead, but what if Margaret still had that .38 around? ââ¬ËBut there I was on Saturday afternoon, spread out ââ¬Ë on a blanket in the back yard, covered with suntan lotion and listening to Top Forty on the radio. Mom hated that stuff and usually she'd yell out at least twice for me to turn it down before she went nuts. But that day she turned it up twice herself. I started to feel like the Whore of Babylon myself ââ¬ËBut nobody came out of the Whites' place. Not even the old lady to hang her wash. That's something else ââ¬â she never hung any undies on the back line. Not even Carrie's, and she was only three back then. Always in the house. ââ¬ËI started to relax. I guess I was thinking Margaret must have taken Carrie to the park to worship God in the raw or something. Anyway, after a little while I rolled on my back, put one arm over my eyes, and dozed off. ââ¬ËWhen I woke up, Carrie was standing next to me and looking down at my body.' She breaks off, frowning into space. Outside, the cars are whizzzing by endlessly. I can hear the steady little whine my tape recorder makes. But it all seems a little too brittle, too glossy, just a cheap patina over a darker world ââ¬â a real world where nightmares happen. ââ¬ËShe was such a pretty girl,' Stella Horan resumes, fighting another cigarette. ââ¬ËI've seen some high school pictures of her, and that horrible fuzzy black-and-white photo on the cover of Newsweek. I look at them and all I can think is, Dear God, where did she go? What did that woman do to her? Then I feel sick and sorry. She was so pretty, with pink cheeks and bright brown eyes, and her hair the shade of blonde you know will darken and get mousy. Sweet is the only word that fits. Sweet and bright and innocent. Her mother's sickness hadn't touched her very deeply, not then. ââ¬ËI kind of started up awake and tried to smile. It was hard to think what to do. I was logy from the sun and my mind felt sticky and slow. I said ââ¬Å"Hi.â⬠She was wearing a little yellow dress, sort of cute but awfully long for a little girl in the summer. It came down to her shins. ââ¬ËShe didn't smile back. She just pointed and said, ââ¬Å"What are those?â⬠ââ¬ËI looked down and saw that my top had slipped while I was asleep. So I fixed it and said, ââ¬Å"Those are my breasts, Carrie,â⬠ââ¬ËThen she said-very solemnly: ââ¬Å"I wish I had some.â⬠ââ¬ËI said: ââ¬Å"You have to wait, Carrie. You won't start to get them for another â⬠¦ oh. eight or nine years.ââ¬
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